Conundrums to Guess Archive

Toasted Puzzler

This one's just for fun. You can make it harder or easier by varying the shapes. Enjoy.


It's All About Color
Answers

Match these colorful titles with their respective authors.

The Titles

  1. The Golden Bough
  2. Hills Like White Elephants
  3. The Color Purple
  4. The Hunt for Red October
  5. Betsey Brown
  6. A Clockwork Orange
  7. How Green was My Valley
  8. The Silver Chalice
  9. The Bluest Eye
  10. Black Beauty
  11. Old Yeller
  12. The Pearl

The Authors

  1. Alice Walker
  2. Anna Sewell
  3. Anthony Burgess
  4. Ernest Hemingway
  5. Frederick Gipson
  6. James Frazer
  7. John Steinbeck
  8. Nzotake Shange
  9. Richard Llewellyn
  10. Thomas Costain
  11. Tom Clancy
  12. Toni Morrison

Jumbo Shrimp and Darkness Visible

An oxymoron is a phrase containing opposite or contradictory terms or ideas.
Send us three original oxymorons and you'll win a snarkolicious award.


Science Fiction/Fantasy Scramble
Answers

Unscramble the letters to discover the names of nine well-known SF/F authors.

  1. Library Mad Zone
  2. Arrive Lynn
  3. Ronnie Be Hitler
  4. Barb hold Urn
  5. Quail sunk lure
  6. Radar by Ruby
  7. Fern berth ark
  8. Then skin Peg
  9. Lob us old Jim

A Mystery for You to Solve
Answers

Here's a mystery for you to solve. Twenty-Six mystery writers in search of their main character. Can you match the author with the sleuth?

The Authors

  1. Nevada Barr
  2. Lawrence Block
  3. Raymond Chandler
  4. G.K. Chesterson
  5. Agatha Christie
  6. Patricia Cornwell
  7. Earl Dere Biggers
  8. Arthur Conan Doyle
  9. Janet Evanovich
  10. Sue Grafton
  11. Martha Grimes
  12. Dashiel Hammet
  13. Joan Hess
  14. P.D. James
  15. John Kellerma
  16. Mary Jane Maffini
  17. Marcia Muller
  18. Sara Paretsky
  19. James Patterson
  20. Dorothy L. Sayers
  21. Georges Simenon
  22. Mickey Spillane
  23. Sarah Strohmeyer
  24. Rex Stout
  25. S. Vane Dine
  26. Susan Wittag Albert

The Sleuths

  1. V.I. Warshawsky
  2. Stephanie Plum
  3. Sherlock Holmes
  4. Sharon McCone
  5. Sam Spade
  6. Richard Jury
  7. Philo Vance
  8. Phillip Marlowe
  9. Nero Wolfe
  10. Mike Hammer
  11. Lord Peter Wimsey
  12. Kinsey Millhone
  13. Kay Scarpetta
  14. Inspector Jules Maigret
  15. Hercules Poirot
  16. Father Brown
  17. Claire Malloy
  18. China Bayles
  19. Charlie Chan
  20. Camillia McPhee
  21. Bubbles Yablonsky
  22. Bernie Rhodenbarr
  23. Anna Pigeon
  24. Alex Delaware
  25. Alex Cross
  26. Adam Dalgleish

Spring Poems & Poets
Answers

April, when spring begins to blossom, is National Poetry Month in the U.S. Let's celebrate both.
See if you can match the poem depicting spring (A - I) with the poet (1 - 9)

The Poems

  1. in Just…
    spring            when the world is mud…
    luscious the little
    lame balloonman
  2. Behold, this crocus is a withering flame;
         This snowdrop, snow; this apple-blossom's part
         To breed the fruit that breeds the serpent's art.
    Nay, for these Spring-flowers, turn thy face from them,
    Nor stay till on the year's last lily-stem
         The white cup shrivels round the golden heart.
  3. Random thoughts
    and loneliness trouble me
    but I am soothed by the
    anticipation of cherry blossoms
    and spring rain falling on my hut.
  4. April is the cruelest month, breeding
    Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing
    Memory and desire, stirring
    Dull roots with spring rain.
  5. A LITTLE madness in the Spring
    Is wholesome even for the King,
    But God be with the Clown,
    Who ponders this tremendous scene…
    This whole experiment of green,
    As if it were his own!
  6. Open my ears to music; let
         Me thrill with Spring's first flutes and drums…
    But never let me dare forget
         The bitter ballads of the slums.
  7. For oft, when on my couch I lie
    In vacant or in pensive mood,
    They flash upon that inward eye
    Which is the bliss of solitude;
    And then my heart with pleasure fills,
    And dances with the daffodils
  8. I remember, I remember
    There were ghostly veils and laces…
    In the shadowy bowery places…
    With lovers' ardent faces
    Bending to one another,
    Speaking each his part.
    They infinitely echo
    In the red cave of my heart.
    'Sweetheart, sweetheart, sweetheart.'
    They said to one another.
    They spoke, I think, of perils past.
    They spoke, I think, of peace at last.
    One thing I remember:
    Spring came on forever,
    Spring came on forever,"
    Said the Chinese nightingale.
  9. O thou with dewy locks, who lookest down
         Thro' the clear windows of the morning, turn
         Thine angel eyes upon our western isle,
         Which in full choir hails thy approach, O Spring!

The Poets

  1. William Wordsworth
  2. Dante Gabriel Rossetti
  3. Emily Dickinson
  4. Vachel Lindsay
  5. E. E. Cummings
  6. William Blake
  7. Otasaki Rengetsu
  8. T.S. Eliot
  9. Louis Untermeyer

What's It About & Who Said It?
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The letters for the quotation are in the right columns, but they have been put in alphabetical order. Can you reconstruct the quotation? Words may extend more than one line, and only end when you reach a black box. All punctuation has been removed.

Once you have the quote, tell us: What subject is the quotation about, and who said it?


I Write, Therefore I Am
Answers

Therefore, by my writing, who am I?

Think you know who said what? Here's your chance to prove it! Listed below is a list of (hopefully!) ten very distinct quotes, all about writing. Below that are the names of ten very different authors. Your goal? Match up the author with their quote!!

So then, he said…

The Authors...


Think You Know The Snarkers?
Answers

Here's you chance to prove how well you do. Listed below are six questions with six sets of very distinct answers. The challenge here is to match the answers to the appropriate snarker - good luck!!

The Snarkers

Baker * Beaver * Bellman * Billiard * Boots * Butcher

Questions

  1. Why do you write about what you write about?
  2. If you became the leader of your country (ie. President, Prime Minister) what is the first change that you would make?
  3. If you were to get a tattoo would would it be? If you have one, what is it? Where is it?
  4. Other than Toasted Cheese, list three other web sites that you frequently visit.
  5. Which of the seven dwarves would you be?
  6. Which would you most like to have:
    1. your picture on a stamp
    2. your statue in a park
    3. a college named after you
    4. a Nobel Prize
    5. a national holiday in your honor

Answer Set # 1

  1. It's easier for me to write deep than write shallow. Or maybe I just like being obtuse. Either way, I like the freedom of fiction, plus I think that fiction often gets closer to truth than non-fiction does.
  2. I'd remove all reference to foreign monarchs and questionable deities in oaths of office and citizenship, etc.
  3. Fire.
  4. Google, Salon, IMDb
  5. In the past I would've said Sleepy. Now I'm thinking I'm more of a Grumpy.
  6. A Nobel Prize

Answer Set # 2

  1. Because I'm highly disturbed. Also because in my self-importance I think I have something to say.
  2. I would declare myself "dictator for life."
  3. An arrow. Probably on the hipbone or thereabouts. There's also that celtic cross on the back I've considered that creeps everyone out.
  4. Not "frequently," since that would give me away but favorites nonetheless: The Onion, Emotion Eric, Pandora's Box
  5. Grumpy. Get out of my way, shorty.
  6. a Nobel Prize

Answer Set # 3

  1. Because it comes naturally to me - it's something I can do easily, and I can do well.
  2. I'd want to do something that would be reflective of my gender, either by increasing funding to help abused women or ease the battle against abortion.
  3. Maybe my name, spelt in chinese letters, at the base of my spine.
  4. M-W, HBO, All Recipes
  5. Happy
  6. c) The college

Answer Set # 4

  1. Because it's there.
  2. If I were a president, I wouldn't have to make change, I could put it all on the White House account.
  3. Tattoo would be on Fantasy Island, of course. (De plane! De plane!)
  4. There are other websites??
  5. Snuffy.
  6. Not a), since you have to be dead for a). Maybe not e) either, dunno the rules for that one. You can live and get the others, though. b) would cost you money unless you were dead. e) would cost you BIG money. I guess that leaves d) which would result in your getting money, and you are allowed to be alive to spend it.

Answer Set # 5

  1. Because I get to use all of my creative abilities. Everything and anything I've ever dreamed up can go in them. My past, my perceived future, my present, whatever.
  2. Raise the dollar limit for social programs so that the people that live on the fringe of "have" and "have not" can get the care and attention they deserve.
  3. I don't have one, but I'd like to get the astrological symbol for Aries on the left side of my neck. I kind of also want the symbol for Libra on my wrist.
  4. No Noun-Sense, Gamesville, and Zigire
  5. Happy.
  6. A national holiday. I'd love to be thanked that many times by that many people.

Answer Set #6

  1. I often find myself inspired by real life. The things I end up writing about are the things that I just can't NOT write about!
  2. Mandatory afternoon siestas. : )
  3. I do have one...which surprises a lot of people! It's a violet, on my lower back.
  4. I'm afraid I haven't been doing much surfing lately...
  5. Sleepy. ; )
  6. c. a college named after you

Scrambled Titles and Toasted Cheese!
Answers

If you haven't read the first issue of Toasted Cheese, now's the time to check it out. If you have read it, impress everyone one with how close you paid attention. Listed below are passages from each of the seven stories found in Volume One, Issue One. Below that, are the titles of the stories, but they've somehow gotten scrambled up. Arrange the letters to form the proper titles then match them to the appropriate passages.

Passages

  1. So here I wait, 45 minutes later, tapping my French manicure against the leather-wrapped steering wheel, anticipating that green light, seething at Barbie and Ken on their waxed Jet-Ski-Built-For-Two. That snapshot we consumers are allowed to witness of their plastic, imagined lives, interrupted by long, deckled strips of a rippling pool.
  2. "Mama?" Callie whispered. Her mother turned away and hid her face against the icebox, her bobbed hair shaking.

    Callie stared at Ellen, then at her mother. What did we do?

    "Take them away," her mother hiccuped.

  3. "Are you okay, George?" The teller asked as he counted twenties. "You don't look so well." He initialed the deposit book and handed it back to George.
  4. "Mike and I are going to dance," Aisling says.

    Why she is telling me this? She's been dancing all night. I guess I'm supposed to be happy because this is Bio-Mike. "Have fun," I say, dismissing them.

  5. Croissant Woman spotted me watching her. I smiled broadly and waved. Her eyes grew. They resembled lottery balls, flashing the day's numbers from her head. The other woman ducked her head and walked to her car.

    I flicked ashes.

  6. "What happens when they don't say goodbye?" I asked.

    "I dunno. Some people think they hang around for a while," Heather said.

  7. "I believe what Madam smells is the aromatic almond pesto vinaigrette dressing. A family recipe. Quite safe, I assure you." Jarvis kept his tone soothing. "Mr. Rathskeller would no more poison you than I would, Madam."

Titles

  1. Nnaa Era's Dtrbyiha Ecka
  2. Posu Ot Sutn
  3. Em
  4. Dalni's Kittec
  5. Naglis
  6. Eb Lrfceua Hawt Uot Shwi Rfo
  7. Tomhre's Tqobeuu

For every beginning there is an ending
Answers

Listed below are the beginnings to eight short stories, written by fairly well known authors. Below that, are the endings to the eight stories. Below that, is a list containing the titles of the story as well as the author. The challenge? Figure out which beginning belongs with which ending, as well as the title of the story.

Beginnings

Endings

Titles and Authors


"Please allow me to introduce myself."
Answers

The challenge is to identify from what books we pulled these selections as well as the name of the character being introduced. In most examples, this is our first glimpse of the character. For one, it is an eerie foreshadowing that gives us a glimpse of what the character will do through his action. One selection is the character describing himself at a job interview. Two passages have been altered to eliminate character names. You think we want to make this easy?

  1. His left leg was cut off close by the hip and under the left shoulder he carried a crutch, which he managed with wonderful dexterity, hopping about upon it like a bird. He was very tall and strong, with a face as big as a ham - plain and pale, but intelligent and smiling.

    Hint: Think of famous characters who used a crutch. Would it help to imagine a parrot on his shoulder?

  2. She got a long pointed nose and a big fleshy mouth. Lips look like black plum. Eyes big, glossy. Feverish. And mean. Like, sick as she is, if a snake cross her path, she kill it.

    Hint: This Pulitzer Prize winning novel is written in dialect-heavy "letters" to God and to the narrator's sister. The character she describes here is her husband's lover.

  3. "I USHERED SOULS INTO THE NEXT WORLD. I WAS THE GRAVE OF ALL HOPE. I WAS THE ULTIMATE REALITY. I WAS THE ASSASSIN AGAINST WHOM NO LOCK WOULD HOLD." (followed by: "Yes, but do you have any particular skills.")

    Hint: This science fiction/fantasy character always speaks in all capital letters. He is a recurring character in the author's Discworld Series.

  4. His face was strong - a very strong - aquiline, with high bridge of the thin nose and peculiarly arched nostrils; with lofty domed forehead, and hair growing scantily round the temples but profusely elsewhere… The mouth, so far as I could see it under the heavy mustache, was fixed and rather cruel-looking, with peculiarly sharp white teeth; these protruded over the lips, whose remarkable ruddiness showed astonishing vitality in a man of his years.

    Hint: In the many film incarnations, this suave Eurpoean character never wears a mustache, although the teeth always fit this description.

  5. We crowded round and over Miss __'s head I had a peep at a dirty, ragged, black-haired child, big enough both to walk and talk - indeed its face looked older than __'s - yet, when it was set on its feet, it only stared round, and repeated over and over again some gibberish that nobody could understand.

    Hint: The name omitted from this Victorian romance's passage is Catherine. A good name to yell across the moors.

  6. She wore a slipover jersey sweater and a tweed skirt, and her hair was brushed back like a boy's. She started all that. She was built with curves like the hull of a racing yacht, and you missed none of it wit that wool jersey.

    Hint: This character is the epitome of the Lost Generation. The novel has been mentioned in at least one "Absolute Blank" article.

  7. In other words he was a carbon-based bipedal life form descended from an ape. More specifically he was forty, fat and shabby and worked for the local council. Curiously enough though he didn't know it, he was a direct male-line descendant of Genghis Khan, though intervening generations and racial mixing had so juggled his genes that he had no discernable Mongoloid characteristics, and the only vestiges left in (him) of his mighty ancestry were a pronounced stoutness about the turn and a predilection for little fur hats.

    Hint: Perhaps the best known science fiction/fantasy novel, it tells us the meaning of life, which is "42".

  8. But for all the modesty of her spreading skirts, the demureness of hair netted smoothly into a chignon and the quietness of small white hands folded into her lap, her true self was poorly concealed. The green eyes in her sweet face were turbulent, lusty with life, distinctly at variance with her decorous demeanor. Her manner had been imposed on her by her mother's gentle admonitions and the sterner discipline of her mammy; her eyes were her own

    Hint: This was the best selling book of the Depression era and its Southern heroine, described here, was captured brilliantly on film... by an Englishwoman.

  9. Slowly he took off his jacket and untied his tie, watching every move he made as if it were somebody else's movements he were watching. Astonishing how much straighter he was standing now, what a different look there was on his face. It was one of the few times in his life that he felt pleased with himself.

    Hint: This character takes over the life of Dickie Greenleaf and gets away with murder. Matt Damon fans might guess this one easily.

  10. The boy had a sharp, delicate face the color of ivory and he seemed to have eyes too big for it. He had also a lot of hair which tumbled over his forehead in heavy locks and made his face seem smaller. He looked like a boy who had been ill, but he was crying more as if he were tired and cross than as if he were in pain

    Hint: This boy rediscovers the joy of life, aided by his cousin Mary, some friends and a "magical" place. This is another book adapted for the movies and for the stage, both as a play and a musical


How Well Do You Snark?
Answers

  1. How many make up the crew, and can you name them all?
  2. The Baker claims he can only make one thing. What is it?
  3. The Butcher claims to kill only one thing. Who should be scared of the Butcher?
  4. According to the crew, Mercator's North Poles, Equators, Tropics, Zones and Merdian Lines are merely what?
  5. Which two of the crew worked hard at sharpening a spade?
  6. What did the Baker do when the Bellman mentioned Boojums?
  7. The Butcher offers a math equation in Fit The Fifth. What's the Answer?
  8. Why would the sentencing have no effect in the Barrister's Dream?
  9. How much money did the Banker offer the Bandersnatch?
  10. Who vanishes in Fit the Eighth?

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